I’ve been a homeschool mum for nine years – but here are some things my kids have taught me

Half the time I’m not sure who’s really teaching who!

Today, my fourteen-year-old headed off for her first day at her new school (although I’m not sure I can call it a school, it tailors the study to each child and it’s very forward-thinking). It’s a pivotal moment for us all, because the last time we waved her off to an educational institution was in December 2014! In between these two events, the past nine years of homeschooling now seem to have gone in the blink of an eye. I know I’ve taught both my kids a lot of things (I’m particularly proud of my success in not only teaching two kids with dyslexic traits to read, but that they now both LOVE books). However, I’ve learned so much from them too! Here are some of the things I’ll carry with me into the next phase of life (although I’m not quite done yet, my ten-year-old is still learning at home).

1. Strength, vulnerability and self-belief

Homeschooling is very much outside the mainstream, and over the years many people have casually asked my kids about school. All of us (parents and kids) are wary of these conversations with strangers, never quite knowing the reaction we’re going to get. Some people are passionately opposed to learning at home – and their questions suggest that they think we keep the kids in a cupboard under the stairs. Other people are surprisingly supportive. Watching the kids talking honestly, bravely and enthusiastically about homeschooling, despite knowing full well that some people are going to think we’re really weird, is truly inspiring!

2. Honesty and forgiveness

When your kids are at home all the time, they see all your moods, and respond to them. I was expecting to have lots of conversations about how they feel and why, but I wasn’t expecting to have so many discussions about me! My kids witness everything: each little mistake I make, every slipped word, the swearing (oops!), and all the occasions when I’m distracted and not really listening. It can be intense, but overall the need to work through these moments has made me a much better communicator (and more aware of my shortcomings)! And when I explain why I’m so grumpy and distracted (the child-friendly version, with less swearing), my girls are very forgiving.

3. Persistence

Both of the kids have surprised us with how much they’re prepared to persist when they really want to master or achieve something. My older daughter has learned how to back herself at times when she’s felt excluded, disliked or the ‘unusual’ one. She’s kept going for years in scenarios where I would have been tempted to throw in the towel for an easy life. It’s inspiring, and I love watching her resilience and trust in herself grow.

4. Learning happens best when it isn’t forced, and when it’s mixed with fun

It’s very obvious that my kids work better if they know why we’re doing something. As a result, I’ve learned to focus much more on my why too. They also do much better when we break up the academics with some fun (and we try to make the work itself fun of course!) – and they encourage me away from my desk to play games or head outdoors with them for a while.

5. Creativity

I’m constantly amazed at the creative things my kids find to do when we’re not actively trying to teach them anything. Some of their best projects grow out of boredom. They always want to be involved in DIY, and they’re constantly setting themselves creative challenges or finding new things to do. When they’re let loose without too much pressure on their time, it becomes craft-tastic in our house, and now these young artists are teaching me a thing or two about creativity (in fact, tonight I’m being taught how to make paper flowers!). 🌷

6. Re-education

The kids aren’t the only ones benefiting from lessons or events: I’m learning heaps too! There’s so much I’d forgotten from school, from details of the solar system to algebra (although I’ll be happy to re-forget algebra after we’ve finished)! I’ve also learned a lot about how the expectations of the school system trained my mindset and values, but that’s a whole other post.

As a result of all this, as I watch my eldest head into a new phase of her life, I’m not only a proud mum. I’ve benefited so much from my kids’ insights, experiences and self-awareness over the last nine years, thanks to this incredible journey we’ve been on together. There have been highs and lows along the way, but all in all it’s been the privilege of a lifetime. And while today might be an ending of sorts, it’s the sweetest of its kind: wrapped in exciting new beginnings.